How You Show Up Matters More Than You Think: What I Tell Every New Grad I Coach

How you show up as a person—with authenticity, integrity, curiosity, and a willingness to take responsibility are the real foundations of how you build your reputation, especially when you’re new and everything feels unfamiliar.

Over the years, I’ve coached and mentored dozens of early-career engineers and STEM graduates stepping into their first corporate roles.

Whether it’s a design engineer starting fresh out of college or a new technical marketing manager eager to make a mark, the most common question I get is:

“What do I need to do to be successful?”

It’s a fair question. You’ve worked hard to get to where you are now, and now you want to start strong to build the career of your dreams. Many expect a magical list—five or ten “must-dos” that will unlock the secret to thriving in tech. It’s easy to start believing that everyone else got some secret memo about how to succeed—and you didn’t.

But here’s the truth: There’s no secret memo. No formula you’re missing.

In fact, success in the early stages of your career usually comes down to something far more foundational: how you show up.

And I don’t just mean showing up on time—although, yes, do that too. I mean how you show up as a person—with authenticity, integrity, curiosity, and a willingness to take responsibility. These are not just buzzwords. These are the real foundations of how you build your reputation, especially when you’re new and everything feels unfamiliar.

In my humble opinion, that’s the real differentiator.

Why? Because skills can be taught. Tools can be learned. But how you relate to challenges, feedback, uncertainty, and the people around you—that’s what sets you apart.

With over two decades in the tech industry, I’ve seen patterns. And when I think about the new hires who stand out—not just as “smart” or “capable” but as people others want to work with—it comes down to a few ways of being. What I expect from Interns and New Grads is simpler than you think.

 1. Show up reliably.

Be someone people can count on. That means delivering your work on time—and, by "on time," I mean delivering the final version at the deadline, not your first draft. If you need feedback (and you probably will), give yourself space for iteration. It’s a simple but powerful expression of responsibility and self-management.

2. Be curious.

There’s no prize for knowing everything in your first few months. In fact, pretending you do can get in the way of actual learning. Soak things up like a sponge. Stay open. Ask questions. Observe. Listen.

3. Be responsible (not dependent).

Ask questions, yes—but don’t outsource your thinking. Come with a proposed solution or draft plan. When you do your due diligence before asking for help, it shows initiative, ownership, and thoughtfulness. You’re not just offloading the problem—you’re engaging with it. It builds trust.

4. Align with what matters.

Understand what matters to your team. Ask about goals. Clarify priorities. Don’t just work hard—work smart, and in the right direction.

5. Reflect on feedback.

Feedback will come. Some of it may sting. But resist the urge to get defensive because it shuts down learning. Instead, practice courage and reflection. Ask: “What’s the truth in this for me?” This kind of self-awareness is essential to growth. (And if the feedback is actually inappropriate? That’s a different conversation—and one worth having.)

6. Ask for help—but don’t abdicate responsibility.

When things feel hard, don’t suffer in silence. Yes, do your due diligence—but if you’re stuck, speak up. If you’re struggling, talk about it. You don’t have to figure it all out alone. This demonstrates both vulnerability and accountability—two core elements of personal leadership.

There’s no “right” way to grow your career.

Here’s the thing: there’s no universal blueprint for career success. Everyone’s path is different. Some people thrive by going deep in one domain; others zigzag through functions and learn by doing. The “right” way is the one that feels aligned to who you are.

But the foundation for any path—technical or otherwise—is the same:

Know how you show up.

That’s where tools like the Being Profile become powerful. They help you develop awareness of how you're being in your work—not just what you’re doing. It digs into aspects like responsibility, assertiveness, resourcefulness, reliability, even your relationship with courage. These aren't soft skills—they’re leadership foundations, even for individual contributors. Once you see it, you can shift it. And those shifts—small, intentional changes in how you be—are what move the needle in your career.

So, if you’re just starting out and feeling overwhelmed, let me leave you with a quote I’ve held close throughout my own journey:

“To climb steep hills requires a slow pace at first.”

— Shakespeare

Take the pressure off. You’re not behind. You’re building. Stay aware. Stay open. Keep showing up.

The rest will come.

If you're just starting out in your career—or even if you're a few years in and feeling stuck—I’d love to support you. Whether you’re navigating your first role, looking to build confidence, or simply want to show up more intentionally at work, coaching can help you get there.

I use the Being Profile as a foundational tool in my coaching practice. It’s not about labeling you—it’s about giving you powerful insights into how you relate to awareness, integrity, anxiety, responsibility, authenticity, and more. And once you can see it, you can shift it.

If you’d like to know more about how the Being Profile works or want to explore what coaching could look like, reach out for a discovery conversation.